Wednesday, October 21, 2009

A Wednesday with Heidi

I'm thankful for…this date 6 years ago. Unexpected trip to Red Deer, high blood pressure, nasty gas & all…I’m so grateful for the safe arrival of our Amanda Ruth Werdal. I’m also thankful for my mom on this day…Manda shares a birthday with her. Rather appropriate I think…after all, Manda wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for my momJ. It’s fun to see the special bond the 2 of them have developed!

I'm listening to…quiet…

What’s happening with the kids? Well, after a nasty week & a half, I think they’re all on the way to being healthy. Manda’s still loving gymnastics. Benjamin had PT interviews on Monday & “passed” with flying colors. It was fun to see the interaction between him & his teachers…and also for Ben to be able to be there. Kirby is just Kirby…the endearing troublemaker…makes me pull my hair out one minute & makes me laugh the next. The boys started hockey on Friday. Kirby was giddy with excitement for 2 days (from the moment he found out)…until he stepped on the ice. Then I think he realized that it was going to be no easy task learning to skate. He still had fun, but it was a bit of a struggle. He has a practice on Saturday that Ben will take him to & go on the ice with him, so hopefully that’ll give him a boost. Benjamin fit right back in doing great. He’s enjoying knowing a few more of the kids from school.

What’s new with Ben & I? Ben is healthy again after a rather crazy couple of days. He’s also going absolutely crazy with work right now. Of course we’re very thankful for the work…but we’re down to Ben & 2 guys…with enough work for about 6 guys…so it’s rather stressful.

I ended up having 6 nights in a row with only 3 or 4 hours of sleep…was brutal…but I made it through…although I’m still coughing a bit now. The first full night of sleep I got after all that…I woke up & was trying to figure out who had woken me up…which kid was in bed…who was crying…if Ben had a fever again…then I looked at the clock & it was morning! A very pleasant surprise indeedJ. I’m swamped right now. Homeschooling while having Benjamin in school is not going so well. Everything revolves around Benjamin’s schedule & it’s really hard. I have 3 sets of pictures to try & get edited…plus the school ones I took of the kids. Plus bookwork is behind & there are always the tasks on the to do list that just never even get thought of. Someday…(will it ever come?)

What’s happening around the house? Trina came & cleaned floors with me today!!! Feels amazing…they were driving me crazy! I also cooked a pumpkin today so I’ll be able to make pumpkin pie, muffins…to my hearts contentJ. It cost me $3 to get a huge pumpkin that’ll make oodles of pies & muffins…whereas buying canned pumpkin would have cost $4 just for 2 dozen muffins or 2 pies…I love getting deals!

What's happening in my kitchen? The birthday girl/boy always gets to pick supper in our house…Manda’s choice for tonight was broccoli cheese soup, whole wheat biscuits, & pineapple, cantaloupe & strawberries for dessert…girl after my heartJ.

I am missing…my dad. I know…again it seems strange. I had a chance to catch up with my mom, Drew & Trina some this week which was really nice. On Saturday the kids & I went to the Lacombe corn maze with them & also to watch Drew run in provincials for cross country. My dad was there too…I just didn’t get much chance to talk to him. I’ve seen him a couple of times in the last week actually…but I guess what I love doing with him…hanging out, playing games, watching movies, chatting…I haven’t gotten to do.

We had a blast on Saturday though. Andrew placed 58th in Alberta (senior boys)…pretty darn good if you ask me!!! Plus our school brought home the 2A provincial banner which was super cool. The kids loved had fun going through the corn maze even though it was starting to get dark. Then my mom took the younger 2 to the play area while the rest of us had a race through the other phases of the maze. We had done phase 1 altogether. Two years ago when we did it, my dad & Trina beat Drew & I for both phases 2 & 3. This time Benjamin wanted to come with us all. My dad & Trina won phase 3, but Drew & I kicked their butts on phase 2. Benjamin had a hoot. When we were still altogether in phase 1 he made a comment that “This is so much fun Mommy…the only thing that would make it funner is if it got harder & harder!” Well, our races in the dark were harderJ. We ended the evening going out for supper at Wendy’s. The kids slept well on the way homeJ.

OK so after writing that I think I’m out to lunch…I had lots of time to spend with my dad on Saturday…I guess it’s just the talk time I’m missing…or maybe I’m just still catching up from not seeing him for so long…anyways…all it really says is that I like to spend time with my dad (& all my family) & I miss him…that’s not bad right? So Papa…if you read this…we need to plan a game night soon!! I love youJ.

I am praying for…wisdom. I’m so swamped right now…but I don’t know if there’s something I can drop or should drop. I went through this last fall too & was able to get rid of a bunch of little things I was doing which helped, but now I feel like I’m at bare bones, yet I’m doing too much. Lord please give me wisdom in knowing how to be the wife & mom you want me to be…and if there’s anything I’m doing that I need to let go. Help me to balance all the aspects of life wisely & say no to things I need to let go.

What’s God been doing in my heart? Selfishness vs. self care. I’ve been pondering & I’m curious to know what you think the difference is between selfishness & taking care of yourself. I know we need to think about others before ourselves, but at the same time we need to take care of ourselves physically, mentally, spiritually, & emotionally. So where’s the line? Any verses to back it up? Like I said, I’m pondering & I’d love to hear your thoughts.


Cheri said...

I'm so glad you guys are all feeling better! That Manda picks good suppers! Sounds delicious!

I think the difference is in our attitude. When I really think about it I can tell when I am being selfish and just wanting my own way and when I know that I shouldn't feel guilty about doing something for myself but I tend to feel guilty anyways. It is a hard habit to break.. but I think deep down we can always tell which it is. :) But, that may just be me. :)

Anonymous said...

I always think of the body being the temple of the Holy Spirit. We so abuse those temples, not only spiritually but physically and emotionally. When the temple is stressed and wearing out it is not just ourselves that pay but also our families and ministries. My generation seemed to have a deep respect for people who "burned themselves out for God", but in my own family the only real fruit I saw of that mentality was a lot of family destruction and in some cases resulting problems in those very ministries. Sabbath Rest is a wonderful principle and I pray that you and God can find out together what that needs to mean for you.
Sue Bornowsky

Heidi said...

Thanks so much for your thoughts Cheri & Sue!

Sarah Chapman said...

I cant figure it out either...I know I was raised by a woman with holes in her underwear and ratty drove me crazy the way that she never put herself on the I try to strike the balance of taking care of myself with little things, like a latte, or new underwear oddly enough (haha). And to teach my kids that its not all about them or me, but that Jehovah is the one that counts, and how he feels that really matters. Make Him happy and you'll be happy. It helps me do things that are essential, but make them feel like a luxury.