A Tuesday with Heidi!

I'm thankful for…kids who want to learn more about Jesus & follow Him! They all go through their phases…but they’ve all had their times of saying things out of the blue that just blow me away & it’s so cool!!! I love being able to catch a glimpse of how God is working in their lives! I’m also extremely thankful that my parents are home safe from the Dominican Republic!

I'm listening to…silence…Ben watching the replay of the Oilers game after he got home from hockey.

What’s happening with the kids? Well, Benjamin has a lot going on right now. The last couple weeks he’s had a bit more homework as they are doing a unit about knights & castles. Next week is going to be crazy. Knights & castles homework…spelling…show & share…potluck & he has to bring a food dish from Peru…plus he has to finish his science fair project that he started yesterday (I know, I know…we’ve been running off our feet & I suddenly realized it was next week & he really wants to do it…). Wouldn’t be quite so overwhelming if we had each day between now & then to work on it all…but Ben & I are gone from early, early Friday morning till Sunday evening (more on that later)…plus 2 of those nights he has environment club & one he has Kid’s Rock! Ahhhhhh! Calm down…breathe…ok…we can do thisJ. Manda is thrilled to be back in gymnastics. She loves helping me whenever she can & gets very disappointed if she offers & there’s nothing she can do. I’m learning (slowly) to find little ways to involve her & make her feel special. She loves doing girl things with Mommy whenever possible as well. Most days her & Kirby get along like a charm…some days not so muchJ. It seems like it’s one extreme or the other with them. One day they play nicely together all day long…the next they’re constantly picking at each other…bugging…etc. Kirby has grown up so much lately. He is learning to control his anger & find different ways to express it. Some of the thoughts that have come out of his mouth lately have just blown me away. Kirby is LOVING hockey & is always disappointed if he has to miss a practice.

What’s new with Ben & I? Well, like I hinted, we get to go away this weekend! Ben & I are going to the Breakforth Conference in Edmonton this weekend for the first time. When I was first teaching Sunday School there was a conference in Calgary called TRAIN. I loved going every year to be refreshed, get new ideas & learn from others who had been there. Well, I haven’t been there for a few years now & have missed it. Breakforth is very similar, but on a MUCH larger scale. I get to go to an all day session with Tim Kimmel whose book I’ve been reading (Grace Based Parenting)…Newsboys concert…various seminars Saturday & Sunday…Phil Keagy concert (Ben’s super excited about that). Anyways…I’m really looking forward to hanging out with my hubby for the weekend (even though we’ll be in different sessions)…being refreshed…getting new ideas…and just spending time with the Lord.

We haven’t had much work since Christmas, but have started a couple of insurance jobs that we got from the storm this summer. We’ve been very grateful for that. Last week there was a delay with that & we didn’t know if we’d have work this week. Well, yesterday Ben got a call back about a quote he’d done…and today he poured a footing! First basement of the new yearJ. Thank you Lord!! We’re also very thankful that we were able to get some bank work figured out that will relieve some pressure & get us on our way to being debt free!! Although it’s a ways away yet, that’ll be a joyous dayJ.

What’s happening around the house? Dirtiness…well…I’m just being honest… It’s been driving me crazy…to many messes & piles that I can’t ever seem to catch up to. I guess it’s just low on the priority list right now…which is probably right…but it still makes it harder for me to get motivated to do other things sometimes. Someday…

What's happening in my kitchen? Nothing...no that’s not true…taco saladJ. I’ve been a horrible wife & mother…we’ve had a lot of thrown together, easy meals lately…veggies, bread with honey, avocado wrap, scrambled eggs, fruit, cheese sticks… I have made taco salad though…twice in the last week (second time was leftovers)…and I’m making it again tomorrow! In our house the birthday boy (or girl) gets to choose supper on their birthday…well Kirby picked taco saladJ. I really want to bake some cookies & muffins to get in the freezer…it’s been a REALLY long time (other than a few Christmas goodies). Ah well…someday…

I am missing…slouching…NOT! Ever since Ben put his ribs out back before Christmas he’s been going to the chiropractor regularly to get it all straightened out. The goal is to get him to a point where he can go once a month & stay healthy instead of waiting till his back is horrible. Well, I got motivated to go too (wish I’d done it when Alberta Health Care still covered part!!) After I’d been a few times the chiro commented to me that I was standing a lot straighter. I’ve always known I slouched…but it hurt so much to stand up straight…now I realized that it had felt good to stand up straight & hurt to slouch so I was standing straight automatically! It may seem silly, but this is a big deal for me. This has bothered me since I was in high school but I didn’t know that I could do much about it. I was thrilledJ. I’ve even figured out that “one cheek sitting” is what was putting my hips out. Now if I could just figure out what’s putting my neck out & how to change it…that’s the only part that’s still bothering me!

I am praying for…wisdom as we strive to spend money wisely & be good stewards of what God has given us. I’m also praying for a little boy named Isaiah May whose parents are fighting for his life right now (see my last blog post).

What’s God been doing in my heart? My sister Katrina gave me an audio book for Christmas that I’ve wanted for a long time…The Five Love Languages of Children. If you haven’t read The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman I would HIGHLY recommend it. It gave me so much insight into why I am the way I am…what makes me feel loved & how I love others. I’ve been super excited to read the one about kids. Since I hardly ever have time to sit & read…but I do quite a bit of driving…I have really started enjoying audio books. Anyway…I’ve been working at figuring out the kids’ love languages. I’ll give you a very brief overview of my thoughts…note that this will not do the book justice…I’m just spitting out thoughtsJ.

Benjamin’s primary love language is quality time…I’m sure of it. It makes so much sense. We’ve been having issues with his behavior since he started school. He went from spending all day every day with me with way more opportunity for quality time…to being gone for 7 hours in a day & having everything go, go, go once he gets home. It’s no wonder he has started acting out…he needs that attention back.

For Amanda I’m torn…I think it’s either words of affirmation or acts of service. It means so much to her when positive things are said to her…but that’s not really how she shows love (which is usually a sign of what your love language is). She loves to help me fold laundry, make supper, etc...and got so excited when Ben built a “swing” for her doll…which makes me think it might be acts of service.

Kirby has got to be physical touch…but words of affirmation is right up there for him too. Hugs, kisses & cuddles are so important to him…but he’s also very good at giving positive comments to others. I find his love tank the easiest to fill because he so often comes to me for hugs, kisses & cuddles. I’m just going to start the chapter about how to determine your child’s love language (hopefully when we’re driving this weekend) so I’ll keep you posted if I learn moreJ. I’m already finding that I’m more conscious of what little times I can use to fill their love tanks.

Am I willing to settle for a miracle when God wants to do a great miracle??

Well, it’s been way too long since I blogged...and I plan to do a regular blog soon...but God’s been working in my heart this morning & I wanted to share...

I’ve been following a group on Facebook about a baby boy named Isaiah James May. Isaiah was born into a strong Christian family in October with the cord around his neck & suffered severe oxygen deprivation. Doctor’s said he was brain dead, wouldn’t grow, etc. It’s been slow, but he’s been steadily making progress...eyelids flutter open every day now...his pupils are dilating...he reacts when he gets a shot...his arms & legs move spontaneously. His parents have had to fight for his life from the beginning with HUGE pressure from doctor’s to pull the plug as well as nurses refusing to note many of these improvements on his chart. Well, last night I found out that Alberta Health Services (AHS) has sent a letter to the family stating that as of 2:00 tomorrow afternoon (Wednesday), his treatment team will be taking him off the ventilator because they’ve done everything they can & there’s no hope of recovery. They are going to court today to try to get an extra 90 days.

My first response was anger. It makes me so angry that this could be happening right here in Alberta!!! When did it become OK for doctors to make decisions for parents...regarding life or death!!!??? At the same time my heart is aching for this family. I can’t imagine the pain they are feeling right now. That was the extent of my feelings as I went to bed last night. This morning as I was reading some new posts on the group God laid something on my heart: We’ve been praying so hard for Isaiah’s healing...well...if he’s healed, then he doesn’t need a ventilator, right?! I still agree 100% that AHS has NO RIGHT to make that decision for the family...but I see God using this for HIS honor & glory!! “What is impossible with men is possible with God.” Luke 18:27

As I wrote this down & thought about it more, God brought something else to mind. Maybe the judge will give them the 90 days so that Isaiah can stay on the ventilator a little longer...and then maybe Isaiah will continue making improvements day by day...that would be great. But how much better would it be, if they took him off the ventilator & he was completely healed?! Is God asking us just to trust? All the improvements Isaiah has made are miracles...there is no doubt...doctors said none of those things would happen. What if God is just waiting to do the ultimate miracle & heal him completely...but first we have to trust Him to do it?? A couple of weeks ago I watched the movie “Faith Like Potatoes”. If you haven’t seen it I would HIGHLY recommend it! It is based on a true story, which to me makes it all the more inspiring. I was both encouraged & challenged as I watched. My favorite line in the movie is this: “the condition for a miracle is difficulty; the condition for a great miracle is impossibility”. Are we settling for the miracle when we could have the great miracle?? Obviously, this is not my child...I don’t even know the family...so I say all of this hypothetically. It just got me thinking about how that applies to me right now.

This has been a tough year financially as the economy has greatly affected our work. For pretty much exactly a year now we’ve been learning to trust God in a whole new way. In the past month I’ve watched 2 movies that have been such an encouragement & challenge to me. The first was “Facing the Giants” (also HIGHLY recommended) which reminded me that before God can fully work in my life I have to be willing to give it ALL to Him! I can’t pray for work while really believing that if we don’t get this job we’re hooped. I have to be able to pray for work...at the same time acknowledging that if we don’t get this job, I still believe that God has a plan & knows what’s best for us & I will trust that! When I watched Faith Like Potatoes a couple weeks ago, it just reinforced all of that...and has kept that idea forefront in my mind ever since. My question for myself today is this. Am I willing to settle for a miracle, when God wants to do a great miracle? Will I trust Him enough to face an impossible situation head on...and believe that He can do it!?

Update: The judge decided she needs more time to make a decision about this sensitive issue. They will keep Isaiah on the ventilator till the judge gives her decision on the 27^th. The family is asking for 90 days. Alberta Health Services is only willing to give 30 days. OK Lord, so now how do I pray?? I believe you want to do a great miracle through little Isaiah...

You have worth!

A friend sent this to me via email back in November when I was really struggling. She had no idea how much I needed this encouragement that day…but God knew! Thank you Helen for listening to His leading & sending it!

I pray that it can be an encouragement to you too! God created you…He knows you…He loves you. You are a precious jewel to Him…You have worth!!!

One Flaw In Women
Women have strengths that amaze men...
They bear hardships and they carry burdens,
but they hold happiness, love and joy.
They smile when they want to scream.
They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy
and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in...
They stand up to injustice.
They don't take "no" for an answer
when they believe there is a better solution.
They go without so their family can have.
They go to the doctor with a frightened friend..
They love unconditionally.
They cry when their children excel
and cheer when their friends get awards.
They are happy when they hear about
a birth or a wedding.
Their hearts break when a friend dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member,
yet they are strong when they
think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kiss
can heal a broken heart.
Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.
They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you
to show how much they care about you.
The heart of a woman is what
makes the world keep turning.
They bring joy, hope and love.
They have compassion and ideas.
They give moral support to their
family and friends.
Women have vital things to say
and everything to give.
HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN,
IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.

A Monday with Heidi

I'm thankful for…2 snow/cold days in 8 days! Last Monday it was super cold & the buses were cancelled…we were thrilled to have Benjamin home for a dayJ. It gave us a chance to really get Christmas baking & just hang out together without any pressure of anything planned for the weekend. I really miss having Benjamin at home…but he misses it just as much & talks about it often. He needs to have days when we just stay home & we all really enjoyed Monday. I was doubly thrilled to find out this morning that the buses were once again cancelled. As crazy as it is to hear it’s -42 outside…-56 with the wind chill…I don’t mind at all when it means Benj can stay homeJ. We had a blast decorating gingerbread cookies together…and Benjamin was thrilled to finish all his Christmas crafts & get them wrapped! God knew that I was disappointed to have no Fridays off in December so He gave me 2 Mondays insteadJ. Thank you Lord…it does my heart good to be reminded that You care about the little things in life!

I'm listening to…Christmas musicJ.

What’s happening with the kids? Let’s just say I’m still getting used to having 2 boys & how different they are from girlsJ. Growing up with only one brother who is much younger than me, I never really experienced what boys are like growing up. When we first had Benjamin I remember Ben talking about how boys play so differently & that it’s completely normal. I thought he was crazyJ. I know it sounds stupid…yes, I knew/know how different boys & girls are…but am I really supposed to let them wrestle like that?? Well some days it seems that’s all Benjamin & Kirby do. It’s almost all in fun…but can still get rough. Everything is bugging, poking, prodding, pushing…egging each other on. Sometimes I wonder how different life would be if we only had one of the boys…not that I would wish that in a million years…they just feed off each other so much. I think of Drew being the only boy…and other only boys I know…they seem so different! I know it has a lot to do with personality…but there is something about having more than one of them to feed off each other. Can someone please tell me I’m not crazy or imagining things? I’m not the only one dealing with this right? Anyway…wasn’t meaning to go on about thatJ. So what about Manda? She is loving more & more following me anywhere & everywhere…just chatting…helping…imitating. It’s rather daunting to know you’re always being watched…and knowing that I’m not being anywhere near a perfect example. Thank goodness that God can use me in Manda’s life despite my many imperfections! All that being said, I really have been enjoying this stage of life with the kids. They’re all old enough that we can do so much together and carry on conversations…although sometimes it’s those exact things (especially the second) that can drive me crazyJ.

What’s new with Ben & I? It’s been an interesting few weeks. About 3 weeks ago Ben mentioned to me that he thought one of his ribs was out. He was super busy that week & put off going to the chiropractor till the following week. The next week the chiro here told him just to wait till the muscles relaxed & the ribs would go in on their own. The next week it wasn’t getting better so he went to his chiro in Didsbury. She put the ribs back in & he went & played shinny hockey. 2 days later he could barely move. His back was spasming horribly & he was in a lot of pain. He’s been to the chiropractor 8 times now in the last 3 weeks…which really adds up (especially since Alberta Health no longer subsidizes it)…but we’re very thankful that he is on the mend. We know that we’re better off to deal with it properly now rather than having it continue plaguing him! Ben has missed 3 hockey games already & will miss at least 2 more this week, if not 3. That’s super hard for a man who doesn’t like to even miss one game in a year! He has his mobility back now & it is healing, but he has to be super careful not to reinjure it before it has a chance to completely heal. With Ben hurt, I’m kept super busy around home. I’ve also been working at doing Christmas baking & crafts with the kids.

What’s happening around the house? Lots of baking & crafts. About 4 years ago now I think, I started doing something each Christmas with the kids. That first year it was just Benjamin, but now each of them does a “bulk” craft that they can give. It allows them to participate in Christmas & give without having to buy something. This year I really wanted to find crafts that were simple enough for them to do, but allowed them to express themselves at the same time. I’m thrilled with how they’ve turned out…although Kirby’s doesn’t allow him to express himself as I’d like…but there’s always next year & he still had fun doing itJ. Stay tuned after Christmas & I’ll let you know what they are…I can’t give away the surprise now! The kids & I also love baking together. It’s so much more fun now that they can all be involved. I didn’t know how it would work this year with Benjamin at school, but having the 2 snow days allowed us time to do it so that’s been wonderful.

What's happening in my kitchen? Peppernuts, frosty date balls, no bakes, & gingerbread cookies. More to come…

I am missing…my sister Jodi. She’s the one in our family that I’ve seen the least of lately. We’ve always been close & I miss our talks. I’m looking forward to seeing her SOON!!

I am praying for…our kids. Although I’m thoroughly enjoying this stage with the kids, it has become very real to me in the last year, what a challenge it is to raise kids! Up until now it hasn’t seemed all that hard. Oh, it’s a lot of work, but the discipline & consequences are fairly simple…time out, say you’re sorry…extra chores…lost privilege…you get the idea. In the last 6 months that has suddenly changed. I have realized how much more aware they are of all the ins & outs. It’s not just a matter of telling them anymore…they want to know why…but what about this & that…and still stamp their foot. It’s scary. Lord give us wisdom. Help our kids to grow up to love You with all their hearts despite the fact that we are such imperfect parents! Thank you that your grace is sufficient to cover all of that!

What’s God been doing in my heart? I have been learning something about myself in the last year or so of our marriage...nothing amazing or life changing…just the simple art of being aware of what is making me feel a certain way. One specific time I notice this is after Ben has been sick or hurt. Almost without fail in the first few days after he starts to feel better, I get frustrated with life…and usually take it out on him. Sure enough…Ben’s ribs started to heal & I felt like I was being cheated. I had faithfully taken care of him…and now it was my turn…I wanted to be taken care of! Yikes Lord…am I really that selfish? I didn’t take care of him expecting anything in return…so why does my sinful nature pop up now? I am thankful that I am finally aware of this feeling so I can learn how to kick it out before it gets bad…and how to choose my responses carefully. Hun…I’m sorry. I thrive on being able to take care of you & the kids…I’m sorry for not always having a good attitude about it. I think I finally get it though. I know I still won’t always respond the right way…but I’m working on it. I love you so much.

Well, it’s technically Tuesday now, but oh well…I still started this on MondayJ. One last thought to leave you with. My sister Jenni posted something last week that really hit a chord. I feel like she was speaking from my heart. I just wanted to share (I hope you don’t mind Jen…I love you…and thank you for sharing your heart!)…http://riceandpeanutbutter.blogspot.com/2009/12/junkyard-art.html

A Weekend Away...

For our first anniversary my parents gave us a weekend away in Canmore. It was wonderful to get away…especially because Benjamin would be born a very short while later. It very quickly became a tradition that I don’t ever intend to changeJ. When the kids were little we would just go for one night, but now we go for 2 nights. Most times we go well after our anniversary because of work…but we always make it happen. So…even though our 9^th anniversary was in September, we went away this last weekend to celebrate…with the way so many marriages fall apart nowadays every year is worth celebratingJ!

The majority of years we’ve stayed at one place…The Georgetown Inn…which I would highly recommend! This year, because money is so tight, we decided to try somewhere new. It was a beautiful inn & we had a wonderfully relaxing weekend! One thing we really enjoyed about the new place we went to was the steam room they had downstairs…so nice to sit in there in the evening! Ben also enjoyed beating me at ping pong in their game room…but make no mistake…I was closeJ!!

We arrived a bit later than we had hoped on Saturday, but got checked into the inn & headed out for supper. We went really fancy & headed to Boston PizzaJ. I guess it’s partly a tradition…partly we just like the food…and partly we go out so little that when we do, we’re excited about our favourites instead of trying something new. Other than some time in the steam room, the rest of the evening was spent relaxing in our room…reading, games…soak in the tub. The room was really neat…when you walk in it’s like a mini living room…couch, little fireplace, TV…the bedroom is upstairs in the loft with a huge skylight. It was really cool to lay in bed & see the stars.

On Sunday we slept through breakfast…that’s what holidays are for right? I had gotten into a book the night before & read while Ben slept some more…I probably should have joined him…J After grabbing a bite to eat we headed to Banff. We did a little walking downtown before heading up to the hot springs for our massage. We went to the spa at the Banff Upper Hot Springs…hoping to go for a soak before and/or after the massage. Unfortunately, they were closed for renovations…but we enjoyed the steam room at the spa & the massage! After our massage we headed to Tony Roma’s for supper (our all time favourite treatJ). After another steam…a game…and some reading, we watched the movie Fireproof. I’ve been wanting to see it since it came out…what a great movie!

We made it to breakfast Monday morning…kind of needed to…we were the only ones left at the inn by thenJ. After wandering through downtown Canmore, we decided to try somewhere new for lunch! The place we went to was gorgeous…the building & the view and the staff was great. We were a little disappointed with the food though…it wasn’t bad…just nothing really great or special about it. The one thing we both REALLY enjoyed though…which will come as a shock to any of you who know me very well…was the calamari. Ben loves anything seafood & in our married life has gotten me to try some of it…none of which I really enjoy. He had gotten calamari once earlier this year somewhere else & had me try it…it was OK, but not something I’d want to have more of. Well…his calamari came & as soon as I smelled it my mouth was watering! I couldn’t believe my own ears when I asked him if I could have a piece. Usually he has to majorly convince me to even try a bite. Not this time…I thoroughly enjoyed it! I know I wouldn’t enjoy calamari just anywhere…but at The Iron Goat they knew how to cook it right!! To end off our weekend we went for a very chilly walk along Cougar Creek & then headed home along Hwy 1A. After enjoying a sighting of some mountain sheep including a big ram & some little lambs (?), we were off.

For all you married couples out there (ESPECIALLY if you have kids) I have some advice…go away together with no kids at least once a year!!! Even if all you can do at first is one night in a hotel room in the town where you live…DO IT!!! It’s so important for our marriages to have that time to reconnect with no kids. To start you off, here’s my list of most important things to bring:

- CD player & CDs (music in the room does so much to create a mood…even if you’re just in a hotel room!

- Massage oil (give each other massages…way cheaperJ)

- Candles (and don’t forget some candle holders & matches or a lighter)

- Books (I like to bring separate books for each of us & something we might read together)

- Games for 2 (our favourites are battleship & boggle)

- Snacks/treats (we like to have sparkling juice & treats)

OK, that’s all I can think of for now…but you have a good start…so go do itJ!

Ben, thanks for taking me on these memory making weekends. I love you so much! Happy 9^th Anniversary!!!