Tuesday, December 15, 2009

A Monday with Heidi

I'm thankful for…2 snow/cold days in 8 days! Last Monday it was super cold & the buses were cancelled…we were thrilled to have Benjamin home for a dayJ. It gave us a chance to really get Christmas baking & just hang out together without any pressure of anything planned for the weekend. I really miss having Benjamin at home…but he misses it just as much & talks about it often. He needs to have days when we just stay home & we all really enjoyed Monday. I was doubly thrilled to find out this morning that the buses were once again cancelled. As crazy as it is to hear it’s -42 outside…-56 with the wind chill…I don’t mind at all when it means Benj can stay homeJ. We had a blast decorating gingerbread cookies together…and Benjamin was thrilled to finish all his Christmas crafts & get them wrapped! God knew that I was disappointed to have no Fridays off in December so He gave me 2 Mondays insteadJ. Thank you Lord…it does my heart good to be reminded that You care about the little things in life!

I'm listening to…Christmas musicJ.

What’s happening with the kids? Let’s just say I’m still getting used to having 2 boys & how different they are from girlsJ. Growing up with only one brother who is much younger than me, I never really experienced what boys are like growing up. When we first had Benjamin I remember Ben talking about how boys play so differently & that it’s completely normal. I thought he was crazyJ. I know it sounds stupid…yes, I knew/know how different boys & girls are…but am I really supposed to let them wrestle like that?? Well some days it seems that’s all Benjamin & Kirby do. It’s almost all in fun…but can still get rough. Everything is bugging, poking, prodding, pushing…egging each other on. Sometimes I wonder how different life would be if we only had one of the boys…not that I would wish that in a million years…they just feed off each other so much. I think of Drew being the only boy…and other only boys I know…they seem so different! I know it has a lot to do with personality…but there is something about having more than one of them to feed off each other. Can someone please tell me I’m not crazy or imagining things? I’m not the only one dealing with this right? Anyway…wasn’t meaning to go on about thatJ. So what about Manda? She is loving more & more following me anywhere & everywhere…just chatting…helping…imitating. It’s rather daunting to know you’re always being watched…and knowing that I’m not being anywhere near a perfect example. Thank goodness that God can use me in Manda’s life despite my many imperfections! All that being said, I really have been enjoying this stage of life with the kids. They’re all old enough that we can do so much together and carry on conversations…although sometimes it’s those exact things (especially the second) that can drive me crazyJ.

What’s new with Ben & I? It’s been an interesting few weeks. About 3 weeks ago Ben mentioned to me that he thought one of his ribs was out. He was super busy that week & put off going to the chiropractor till the following week. The next week the chiro here told him just to wait till the muscles relaxed & the ribs would go in on their own. The next week it wasn’t getting better so he went to his chiro in Didsbury. She put the ribs back in & he went & played shinny hockey. 2 days later he could barely move. His back was spasming horribly & he was in a lot of pain. He’s been to the chiropractor 8 times now in the last 3 weeks…which really adds up (especially since Alberta Health no longer subsidizes it)…but we’re very thankful that he is on the mend. We know that we’re better off to deal with it properly now rather than having it continue plaguing him! Ben has missed 3 hockey games already & will miss at least 2 more this week, if not 3. That’s super hard for a man who doesn’t like to even miss one game in a year! He has his mobility back now & it is healing, but he has to be super careful not to reinjure it before it has a chance to completely heal. With Ben hurt, I’m kept super busy around home. I’ve also been working at doing Christmas baking & crafts with the kids.

What’s happening around the house? Lots of baking & crafts. About 4 years ago now I think, I started doing something each Christmas with the kids. That first year it was just Benjamin, but now each of them does a “bulk” craft that they can give. It allows them to participate in Christmas & give without having to buy something. This year I really wanted to find crafts that were simple enough for them to do, but allowed them to express themselves at the same time. I’m thrilled with how they’ve turned out…although Kirby’s doesn’t allow him to express himself as I’d like…but there’s always next year & he still had fun doing itJ. Stay tuned after Christmas & I’ll let you know what they are…I can’t give away the surprise now! The kids & I also love baking together. It’s so much more fun now that they can all be involved. I didn’t know how it would work this year with Benjamin at school, but having the 2 snow days allowed us time to do it so that’s been wonderful.

What's happening in my kitchen? Peppernuts, frosty date balls, no bakes, & gingerbread cookies. More to come…

I am missing…my sister Jodi. She’s the one in our family that I’ve seen the least of lately. We’ve always been close & I miss our talks. I’m looking forward to seeing her SOON!!

I am praying for…our kids. Although I’m thoroughly enjoying this stage with the kids, it has become very real to me in the last year, what a challenge it is to raise kids! Up until now it hasn’t seemed all that hard. Oh, it’s a lot of work, but the discipline & consequences are fairly simple…time out, say you’re sorry…extra chores…lost privilege…you get the idea. In the last 6 months that has suddenly changed. I have realized how much more aware they are of all the ins & outs. It’s not just a matter of telling them anymore…they want to know why…but what about this & that…and still stamp their foot. It’s scary. Lord give us wisdom. Help our kids to grow up to love You with all their hearts despite the fact that we are such imperfect parents! Thank you that your grace is sufficient to cover all of that!

What’s God been doing in my heart? I have been learning something about myself in the last year or so of our marriage...nothing amazing or life changing…just the simple art of being aware of what is making me feel a certain way. One specific time I notice this is after Ben has been sick or hurt. Almost without fail in the first few days after he starts to feel better, I get frustrated with life…and usually take it out on him. Sure enough…Ben’s ribs started to heal & I felt like I was being cheated. I had faithfully taken care of him…and now it was my turn…I wanted to be taken care of! Yikes Lord…am I really that selfish? I didn’t take care of him expecting anything in return…so why does my sinful nature pop up now? I am thankful that I am finally aware of this feeling so I can learn how to kick it out before it gets bad…and how to choose my responses carefully. Hun…I’m sorry. I thrive on being able to take care of you & the kids…I’m sorry for not always having a good attitude about it. I think I finally get it though. I know I still won’t always respond the right way…but I’m working on it. I love you so much.

Well, it’s technically Tuesday now, but oh well…I still started this on MondayJ. One last thought to leave you with. My sister Jenni posted something last week that really hit a chord. I feel like she was speaking from my heart. I just wanted to share (I hope you don’t mind Jen…I love you…and thank you for sharing your heart!)…http://riceandpeanutbutter.blogspot.com/2009/12/junkyard-art.html

5 comments:

Beckie & Trevor Muirhead said...

I have a couple of comments for you, my dear one...
1. Yes, all boys feed off each other like that. Yes, it gets rough. Yes, we're supposed to let it happen. I know. Weird.
2. I am totally with you on the discipline thing. Eli's newest game is to tell Sam to do something that will get him in trouble. Apparently that's fun. Grr. Lots of responsibility, being a Mom.
3. What you're learning about yourself... Heidi, that is exactly what I'm learning too, although I couldn't have expressed it so well. I'll be praying for you. Interesting that the same demon is haunting us both at the same time. Keep me accountable?
Love you.

Heidi said...

Thanks for letting me know I'm not alone Beckie. It helps to know someone out there knows what I mean:)
I will be praying for you. I'd love to keep each other accountable...not sure how we can best do it...but definitely willing to try. Love you!

Lisa said...

Well, we have 3 boys Heidi, and there is non-stop wrestling going on at our house, every day! I don't get it either! I try to let them have their fun for a while but stop it before someone "loses an eye"! We have our share of stiches and casts around here as it is.

Thanks for always being so honest Heidi. It's refreshing.

Brandy said...

I hear you on the boys thing urgh and mine are only 2 and 3. but anyways I loved this blog. Thanks for writting

Heidi said...

Thanks Lisa & Brandy! I love it when people comment on my blogs...means someone's reading them so I should keep writing!:)